I don't know the exactly trajectory things they make you do, or you make yourself do, or some classmate talking to their parents, or...whom did what, to later years to finish you all...etc etc.

But you are not happy in your own life. When someone told you, your first step is wrong, repeating 16 years what if.... You might just failing it the first try, there is no repeat. Just failing all the way. 

You know how many people go on life to say they are "pre-med" "pre-pharm", and? 

They keep saying that, as that life will be forever one succeeding road, to where what if that will fail all the way. You cannot trumpet to your parents, or your high school, or anyone that close by to associate to your own very narrow life.

Did you ever gone to those medical professional, where you just like your own very doctors? 

And?

Do you ever envision you will become one of them? Seriously to care on the patience, more than Dr. T. I am pretty sure you find him stubborn, on just about there is nothing to talk on you.